This dress was meant to end up on your floor
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
Randomize
