I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I wonder if you're allowed to smoke pot at Denver bronco games now...
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
how drunk are you?
Several
Randomize
