If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
do girls know yet that the best boners are in the morning?
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
Dear Douchebag, I would just like to formally issue this fuck you. You will be receiving a letter in the mail soon. With all of your stuff.
Randomize
