yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
I can't wait till you move in so I can stop drinking alone.
it's a Wednesday?
:)
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I will run into the sunset with a fist full of condoms.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
