you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
listening to the two girls in the next stall finish a 40 and laugh at this guy they both fucked. they're calling him 'tulip dick'.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
apparently it isn't appropriate to tell a coworker who is eating celery because it's "negative calories" that a blowjob is too
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
Randomize
