they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
I just negotiated a blow job for an interview.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
She needs sedatives and a leash
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
