This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I had the most spectatular hardon this morning. I think it was trying to reach you in Wisconsin.
well you can't waste a boner
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I feel like I was dropped out of a helicopter. Through the propeller.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
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