What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
So im guessing you dont remember the walk home, where you layed down in the alley and began to sing "threes company too" and when i told you to get up you had the nerve to tell me i was to drunk.
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
