Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I'm at the airport and there's a guy wearing all camoflash to go hunting .. Should I bump in to him and say woahh sorry didn't see you there?
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
last day of my family cruise we all got trashed and had an award ceremony. I got the award for hooking up with a cougar. my grandma hugged me and said im living up to the legacy. this is why my familys better than yours
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Trying to decide if I'm relieved or disappointed that I didn't receive any fuck boi calls on nye
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
