i either got mauled last night by a velociraptor or an angry lipstick lesbian. could have been both
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I gasped. Both pairs of lips did.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
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