I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
She's like a connoisseur of porn. Her collection has things in it I never even knew existed. She even has an Italian batman porno. Where has she been all my life?
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
I thought I was drunk because I kept grabbing his arm instead of his dick
But then I realized it wasn’t his arm and that I was very lucky
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