Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
90% of the problems in your life are directly related to your vagina
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
I just spiked the applesauce. Try to tell me again your party is better.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
EMERGENCY FRIEND CRISIS: WE HAVE TOO MUCH WHISKEY. ABORT HANGING OUT WITH MELISSA, RECOMMEND TO HANG OUT WITH OUR WHISKEY INSTEAD
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
Randomize
