Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
He really is. Owns his own house and has more than one towel!
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