White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
He has started theming his dick pics. I have one he sent his duck has a sombrero on. Another a Barbie is riding it.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
