Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
It started as a joke and ended with a trip to the emergency room, a broken macbook and a gigantic hole in the concrete of my driveway.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
