Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Nope. Too much basics going on right now. I'm tying you both up and throwing you to the vibrating sexy toy sharks. You shall either sink or get off gloriously.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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