Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
you told grandpa to call you daddy
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
My life has hit a new low, I just licked MDMA of someone's bed.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Just convinced the cute guy from class that I have prostate cancer. GET ME OUT OF THIS TOWN!
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