his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
They broke our car window and then wrote "great night" on the next
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
