Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
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