pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
You told me you would ride a pig into the night sky screaming, "I wear my sunglasses at night"
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I need to wash the frat house off of me
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
Randomize
