If that was your dad, he is hot
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
I'm way too horny to be at work right now. I think it might be legally irresponsible to leave me alone with cucumbers.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Its so hard looking at my mom and pretending I'm not dying a slow death of binge drinking
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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