I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
I finally broke my dry spell. I did it. D-do-da-Dora.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
we've dated a week and made out twice. he is taking it slow. but his body is stupid sexy. just want him to stop respecting me and fuck me like a gutter slut. respect me later im not getting younger.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
