You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Your a horrible friend, i only tried to do the right thing by moving you off the floor.. that was not an invitation to puke all over my bed and attempt to use my dog to mop it up.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
I just used the proceeds from selling my ex's engagement ring to fund my first date with another girl.
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
