Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
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