Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
just learned how to wash a penis. thank you nursing school for getting me the most action i've had in months.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
You are just a treasure cave of fabulous alcoholic ideas.
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
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