I think i sorta joined a cult last night
So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
she's sitting alone using her breathalyzer as a kazoo. help.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
Just so you know.. If you ever cheat on me, i will cut your dick and fingers off and post them as my cover photo on Facebook. Love you.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
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