he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
I am slightly proud of the fact his mom turns on the dryer located behind the spare bedroom EVERY time we visit!
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
I'm gonna have to get a lube sherpa.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize