he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Is 10AM too early for pizza and Dr. Pepper?
Only if 5PM is too early to be drunk. And when has that ever stopped us?
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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