I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
Of course he wants me there for his birthday. If a girl offers you a blowjob for every year of your life, you're gonna want her to be there.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
She kept saying how cute and adorable I was. I felt like a care bear getting a blowjob
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
She definitely peed in a bucket in their closet last night. We should warn them about that, right?
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
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