I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
you win again, gameday.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
good news. it is gonna rain tomorrow so now I don't have to pay to clean the puke off the side of your car.
we're making bets on your personal life
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Randomize
