By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
Drunk texting is the poetry of my life
I can't be held responsible for another man's penis.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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