I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
worst night to have a conscience
There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
I just got a lap dance from a kid in the coconut bra... So not drunk enough for this.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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