If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Getting day drunk before work is perfectly acceptable when its 99 cent margaritas.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
