As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
The gate guard just said to me, "I almost didn't recognize you in uniform. Welcome back." I think I need to lay off the booze.
Randomize
