What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
It’s a dick. Seen one, seen em all. Unless it spews a fountain of tequila, I don’t need to see yours.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
