You're a womanizer and a bitch.
You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I'd google it, but I don't really want my search history to say, "Name for masturbating on a flight."
He offered to let her do a line of coke off his hard-on. She said she'd had that hard-on and it would be a bump, not a line. Everyone laughed. That's why he left.
So that answers the first question but not the second: how the fuck am I getting home?
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
Randomize
