on a scale of one to ten, how awkward would it i told him i had to go change my tampon and then left?
11
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
Just high enough for therapy.
Good god you suck at this wake up call. Seriously. If I can, after consuming enough vodka to subdue a russian soldier, muster up enough motivation to call you in the morning and send you naked pictures the least you could do is pick up.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
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