He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
i may or may not have puked on your loofa in the shower.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
