yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
No stitches, just platelets and will power
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
