On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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