I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
God damn. You sleep with one 40 year old married dude and suddenly you have “daddy issues”. Fuck all of you.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
I got subtly pornographic with a lollipop while we were talking and he got flustered and started to blush. If he’s not interested after that I need to turn in my vagina card.
Randomize