my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
You know that girl that climbed through my window and got in my bed with me and fucked me? It turns out she was real and has a real boyfriend who is real pissed
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
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