is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
its hard to take this fight seriously when one dude is an oompa loompa, and the other is a "g spot"
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Bro, did you watch that scooby doo porn I sent to you?
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize