he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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