i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
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