We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
And. No one ejaculated on anyones face. This is all wrong
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
Randomize
