no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
Randomize
