The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
It's Breast Cancer Awareness Month!!!! What random hook up should check my tata's this year?!?!
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
The party bus is stocked with 5 hour energies and beer and someone handing out adderall. Best. Wedding. Ever.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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