Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Sober January is a disaster.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
I just realized I've stolen a hat from every guy I fucked. Except the last one. Maybe there is hope for me.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
you texted me "dude im face"
it sounded so right at the time
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I think I ejaculated my soul out.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
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