I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
I'm not ok right now. I just walked in on a 600lb woman passed out on the toilet and she walked out and tried to eat her cell phone. I'm on acid I think.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
Randomize
